The Retired Veterans Committee has made a major announcement regarding their most notorious at-large member, Master Roshambollah.
Since joining the RVC, Roshambollah has been under extreme scrutiny. This scrutiny has intensfied by allegations that the retired Roshambollah has been actively competing under an assumed name. These allegations have been bolstered by a masked competitor named the "Midnight Rider" appearing at both the Western Regionals and the Atlantic Yards Smackdown (which he won.) At both of these tournaments, Roshambollah made a brief appearance early on, then disappeared, returning only after the Midnight Rider had left the building.
This simmering pot of contention came to a full boil on the heels of New York Magazine's exclusive report on the Atlantic Yards Smackdown. Their expose of the event named Roshambollah as the winner of the tournament.
Reaction has been swift from the RVC. After convening a week long meeting, members of this august body have made a statement concerning Roshambollah and his latest scandal.
In part, the statement reads, "We, the honored members of the Retired Veterans Committee, are deeply dismayed by current reports of Master Roshambollah returning to active play. This goes against the very spirit of being a Retired Veteran. We realize that the burden of proof is upon us, and there is no such proof of Roshambollah's return to play. However, our hands are forced to act when unretracted reports of Roshambollah winning a major US tournament appear in print (despite none of us having ever actually heard of the publication previously.)"
The statement continues, "It is not within our power to remove a member of the RVC once admitted. However, it is within our power to appoint personal assistants to RVC members. Therefore, it is the will of this body that Master Roshambollah be assigned a "Retirement Manager." This Manager will oversee all aspects of Roshambollah's retirement, including personal appearances, media interviews, organizing tournaments, bids for public office and contact with magazine editors."
"To ensure that Roshambollah's Retirement Manager is subject to the same transparency we expect from all our members, the RVC will appoint to this position an individual pulled from the ranks of the WRPSS Bull Board. Nomination can be declined, and an alternate will be chosen."
The RVC has not yet named an individual to this position, though much speculation abounds. The RPS News Service will be providing this information exclusively as soon as it is available.
The Midnight Rider is not available for comment.