2009 Masters of the Bull Board Tournament

[Master Roshambollah]

Welcome aboard, Jef!  It just wouldn't be a MotBB Online Fantasy RPS Tournament without you.

Players can expect daily status updates throughout the tourney.  Perhaps more often than that.  Players are also encouraged to post their own status and trash talk in this thread.

At present, the following players are signed up for the MotBBOFRPST:

Martin Burley
R Cohrs
custardchuk
Franklint
TGOTT (James Heyes)
Jef Hallestone

Max has expressed interest in joining, but has not yet indicated whether or not he has signed up for facebook.  Max and other interested parties are encouraged to sign up before the deadline Friday night at midnight EST. Even with the current players, there will be 30 matches of exciting Online Fantasy RPS!  (yawn)

I recieved a private message from Al Thorn, and just to put any rumors of conspiracy to bed, the 2009 MotBBOFRPST is not just a clever way to lure Heyes into joining the Bull Board.  But we'll take what we can get.  By the way, James, what does TGOTT stand for?  Speaking for the Board, we like acronyms (just ask C. Urbanus, if you can find him.  He is the commissioner of the PBRPRPSCLCS

One other new wrinkle in tournament format.  For the first time, and in strict defiance of existing WRPSS tournament policy, the 2009 MotBBOFRPST will employ drug testing.  Don't panic; there are no banned substances.  We just want to know what the players are using, and will track player performance in order to determine the effect of controlled substances.  All players are hereby requested to package urine samples and mail them to:

World RPS Society
Prague Office
Prague, Czech Republic

[martinburley]

One thing you can say about Rosh, he knows how to run a tournament. It's always good to see a tournament organiser handling things responsibly and seriously, as opposed to just taking the piss.

[TGOTT]

Stands for The Guy On The Tannoy

I am the tannoy announcer for a local soccer team on matchdays.

[Maxamillion]

well i think i am half way there Rosh.

for somereason or other it would not accept my email address so i have been exchanging messages with the facebook admin.
hopefully it will be sorted out before Friday night.

Keep a space for me! i will get in some how!

Cheers
Max

[Master Roshambollah]

Air Max is in.  WELCOME, SEEKER... (is it safe to use that one again?)

Another note regarding the 2009 MotBBFORPST:  Once all matches have been played, if there is a tie of two or more players for #1, a second double round-robin round will begin among those players.

[Master Roshambollah]

Jef,

As a side note, I was recently approached by Coca-Cola's Mello Yello brand as a potential sponsor for the 2009 MotBBOFRPST.  They are currently researching marketing for new formulations of Mello Yello.  You are the biggest Mello Yello fan in the world, so I suggested that they send samples of their new prototypes to you for sampling.

These samples should be making their way to you at the Prague Office as you read these words.  They will be sent in different types of containers so as to provide single-blind objectivity (though some of the carbonation may be lost in transit.)  Enjoy, and let me know what you think! 

[martinburley]

Rosh, my pot of pee is on its way.

To save you the time of analysing it, here is a list of the drugs that I will be using (to varying degrees and not simultaneously) to enhance my performance in this year's Master of the Bull Board tournament.

Marmite (the Kiwi version, not UK Marmite, and definitely not Vegemite)
Margaritas
Mentos
Chilli peppers
Beechwood Smoke
Absinthe
Pepsi Max


I would also like a ruling on whether I am permitted to use my RPS Analyser (2009 version) in this tournament.

[Master Roshambollah]

Martin,

Thanks for your straight-forward listing, as well as your drug testing submission.

As you are an honorable player (and the 2009 WRPSS Southern Hemisphere Player of the Year) I will take your tale at face value.  However (as the 2009 WRPSS Southern Hemisphere Player of the Year) I will assume your list contains as many red herrings for your opponents as it does actual substances used.

My personal thoughts, as to your substance list:

Marmite (the Kiwi version, not UK Marmite, and definitely not Vegemite)

Have you considered using Hapå instead? 

Margaritas

I hereby disclose my personal margarita recipe:  4 parts Reposado tequila (spring for the good stuff,) 2 parts fresh lime juice, 1 part pure water, 1 part agave nectar.  Shake and pour into glass full of ice; enjoy.  Trust me on this one.

Mentos

Have you tried this?  I wonder if it works with Mello Yello?

Chilli peppers

  Now we're getting somewhere.  I have acquired a small stock of the Parts Unknown Chile (capsicum ignotum) from the Midnight Rider.  It seems to grow quite well.  I would encourage all Bull Boarders to experiment with growing their own hot peppers.  The Bhut Jolokia chile from India grows like a weed, but may be too mild for many enthusiasts.

Beechwood Smoke

You got me on this one.

Absinthe

I've only tried absinthe once.  I was on a visit to North Carolina visiting my friend Boyd and a few other bogans.  I got invited to a dinner party, where I drank a bit of beer and wine, smoked, and turned down some shady looking pills (never had a taste for pharmaceuticals.)  Our friend Nicely had just infused a batch of wormwood extract, i.e., absinthe.  I trust his methods implicitly, and had a few shots of the pleasantly bitter substance.  On the whole, it struck me as a moderately enjoyable social buzz; at least until I tried to go to sleep.  I lay down, stretched out my arms, and noticed that my hands were about 10 feet apart, and green.  The rest of the evening went downhill fast; massive sickness, hallucinations and palpitations.  Martin, if you can get it to work for you, more power to you.

Pepsi Max

Hmmm...Pepsi...are they the same company that makes the AMP energy drink?

I would also like a ruling on whether I am permitted to use my RPS Analyser (2009 version) in this tournament.

Competitors are allowed to use any RPS analysis software they desire, so long as they submit a copy to the tournament organizer before the end of the tournament.

[R Cohrs]

Hmmm, my tourney fuel this year will probably be:

Cass, Hite, Guinness, Budweiser, maybe Soju
Tylenol or Excedrin
Marlboro Reds
Kimchi (I'm pretty sure it's a potent drug of some sort)
Adrenaline
Fear (not mine, feasting off those around me)
Toxic Air (don't know what chemicals I'm breathing here, but there's a mysterious lack of birds here)
And whatever else I can find

I'll have to request to forego the urine test, as mine has been ruled a class C9 Biohazard and is not permitted to travel in any kind of closed delivery system.

[custardchuk]

I'll send the sample. It will be news to me to find out what is in it.

I went out for drinks and dinner last night, (I don't remember much about it) and I woke up with a raging headache and a strange taste in my mouth, same as happened Monday and Wednesday, as well.

On another note, it will be fun to see how Max goes in the trenches.

[custardchuk]

Rosh,
I was reading your excellent post on quantum gambling during the 2008 MotBB and discovered this,

Burley:

Maybe you should take lessons from Brad Fox on exercising your authority. A good ref knows how to gain and keep the players' respect.

Master Roshambollah:

That's it, Martin. I'm pro-actively barring you from the 2009 MotBB tournament.

Wanna make it 2010 as well?

Did you make it 2010, as well? I hope so.
Anyway, Martin, any plans on what you will do in your time off?

regards
custardchuk

[martinburley]

There are considerable rule changes this year ... I reserve the right to alter the rules if there's a glitch.

What can I say? I guess Master Roshambollah considers me a glitch.

[Master Roshambollah]

The 2009 MotBBFORPST is set to begin!  All players will recieve a facebook message from me with further details.

I note that Max has yet to add the Roshambull app.  Max, if you're having problems accessing it, let me know.

[Master Roshambollah]

Another note, before things get started:  throw randomizers are illegal.  This will be on the honor system, but I expect all players to tow the line on this one.  I don't think I need to explain why...

[custardchuk]

"honor"?
Don't you mean" honour"?

Not that honour matters lately.