Posted ByOdoreida on March 13, 2001 at 11:48:56:
I am sure that you were all as shocked and dismayed as I was to hear of Jarob Mundās freak accident at last weekās Aarhus Classic. Jarobās trademark ploy, the use of dramatic facial glare ensured many an unlikely victory against seemingly more technically-gifted opponents. I am thinking, in particular, of the Murdoch-TV sponsored ĪRumble in the Crumbleā ö an eight-man mass RPS brawl held in a giant vat of rhubarb crumble in Upper Hut, New Zealand. The eight were quickly whittled down to just three: Mund, ĪPuritanā Merv Swing and ĪFatā Harry Clark. Clark and Swing held Mund in an apparent two-scissor pincer movement and the immediate future looked bleak for the ĪDanish princeā. But, the use of an irreverent Danish witticism instilled an unnatural fear in both Swing and Clark, both of whom began to shake uncontrollably. Their subsequent failure to make the simplest of hand gestures forced the match referee, Maryleboneās Major-General Bell-End, to disqualify both and declare Mund the eventual winner.
Whatever one might think of ĪMetaphysicalā Mundās secondary hampers, or indeed his participation in the increasingly popular, yet somewhat low-brow proletariat RPS brawls, I am sure you will all join me in wishing him a full recovery. I fear that his playing days are over, but I am sure there is a prominent role awaiting him in the sport's ever-more burdensome administration.
I know Jarob will be reading this so all messages of goodwill and other personal testimonies would be gratefully appreciated (by him).